So, I’m making awesome headway on my 101 in 1001 list. I’ve done way better than I thought I would. Sadly, there is really no hope I will finish it. It’s not that I don’t want to and I consult my list all the time to see if I can knock something off it today… The problem is the reading.
I read… A lot…. When my husband was deployed I was averaging 6 books a month. That went down when he got home and I went back to school, but I still read a lot. And lately, I’ve been reading books faster than I ever thought I would be able to. Between book reviews and all, I’m more than going to finish many of my reading goals. So what’s the problem?
The problem is that I forgot about my addiction to books. I made one of my goals to read all the books I own that I haven’t read yet. When I wrote it last winter, that was already a daunting task. I don’t want to admit in public how many books I own that I have never read. And considering how much I actually read, it’s even more embarrassing. I just really like to buy books. A LOT. A REALLY LOT.
And yet, in spite of having all of those books I’ve never read, and all the books I’ve read so far, I’m making very little headway. And by very little, I mean that I’m actually moving backwards. For all the books I’ve read so far this year, I’ve bought more than that.
I’m so ashamed.
I thought I could stop. But I can’t.
I am looking at my stacks of books. The stack on my night stand, the shelves full in my office, the list on my Nook and the ones on my computer that haven’t even made it to my Nook yet… And I won’t admit how many Kindle books I have for reading on my Kindle app, or iBooks for my iPad… Oh, God. I have a serious problem.
I suppose the first step in recovering from addiction is admitting you have a problem… The second step would be wanting to do something about that problem. But I don’t want to. For all the guilt I have for owning all the books I don’t read and watching my 101 in 1001 list go down the drain, I know I’m not going to stop.
To make my admission to you all even more embarrassing, with all these books unread, I’m currently reading a library book. I’m going to say that again to let it sink in… I own who knows how many books I have never read. And yet, I’m CURRENTLY, RIGHT NOW, reading a library book instead.
I wonder if there is a Book Buyers Anonymous group I can join? Who am I kidding? I’m not going to stop. I like books too much. And I LOVE the under $5 section on Barnes and Noble’s website, have a huge collection of public domain books, and like to buy books at our libraries annual sale to raise money and ask for them for gifts.
See… It’s a true sickness.