For whatever insane reason, my husband and I, whom have never done our own taxes, decided this was a good year to do it. You know, with my weird work history and illness stuff, his military service, business expenses and all kinds of random other crap that makes life confusing. I asked my mother how hard it was to use Turbo Tax and she, who has an accounting degree, said it was easy. I even clarified, “easy for someone with an accounting degree, or actually easy?” She insisted it was easy.
It’s not that I can’t or won’t figure it all out, but man, I miss my accountant. So, while harassing a friend with tax law questions and Googling until my fingers bled, I penned this little ditty for my accountant, whom I miss dearly, feel is incredibly under paid (don’t tell her that though) and am hoping she doesn’t hold grudges and will take us back with pity in her heart next year.
Ode to My Accountant
Oh Accountant, how I adore thee
I never truly appreciated all that you do
So willing to help
Never asking too much
Able to estimate with the very limited information I have
How I never truly understood
The nuances of what you have to know
Vile Tax Law
Living only to vex me
Why must you be so cruel and confusing?
Your wicked, twisted words
Serve only to Bemuddle me
Death and Taxes
Constants in life
How you have simplified my life
Please take me back